Hill Harper always wanted to be a father, but he always envisioned himself doing it the traditional way. He thought that he was going to get married before he started his family. He did not plan on becoming a single father, but he is happy to be a new father.
Hill recently adopted an 18-month old boy named Pierce. He stated that adopting Pierce was the best decision he made in his life. He believes that fate brought him and Pierce together.
Hill began thinking about adoption in Spring 2015. At first, he did not think that he was ready. However, a close friend told Hill that he would make a great parent. Hill contacted an attorney who told him about the process of adoption. The attorney told him that there was a woman who was getting ready to get give birth and was looking for someone to adopt her child.
Pierce was born in December 2015. Hill was there when the baby was born. He also cut the umbilical cord. Hill admitted that he was afraid to adopt the baby at first. He knew that his life was going to change forever. However, the fears that he had are small compared to the joy that he has gained.
Even though Hill is a single father, he has a lot of help. His mother and other close relatives are helping him. He is also getting help from his girlfriend.
There were a lot of things that Hill did not do before he became a parent. The first time he changed a diaper was 18 months ago. However, he is slowly getting the hang of parenting. He is cherishing every moment that he spends with his son.
The New York Times recently published a piece discussing the importance of appropriately acclamation to life following the adoption of a new child. With the rise of adoption in states like New Jersey, new information has been released regarding adaptation procedures when new children are introduced into a pre-existing family system. New parents of adoptive children should be prepared to handle family life in ways that foster the development of adopted children, allow a multitude of emotions to be shared and expressed openly, and be open to new experiences as a result of the new arrangement.
Processing Emotions Following the Close of Adoption Procedures
Adoption procedures are known to be taxing on the parents involved in the process. The grueling process involves a selection of qualities that one will and will not prefer in an adopted child, case studies where homes are scrutinized, and the procurement of enormous amounts of money to finalize the adoption. After this overwhelming process has been completed, new parents are often so relieved to have survived it that they do not adequately prepare for the new journey they are about to take once the child has entered their home. Adopted children, if they are not infants, can be nervous, anxious, or frustrated about engaging with new parents during the beginning of their new lives. These emotions combined with any nervousness the parents may feel can create very unrealistic expectations and behaviors in the home environment. Leading adoption analyst often suggest that new parents take time before the adoption procedures even begin to mentally process the gravity of the circumstance they have chosen. Although no amount of preparation can replace the actual experience of adopting a child, adequate preparation can drastically reduce unrealistic expectations and negative emotions surrounding the adoptive process.
Adjusting to Outside Family
New adoptive families also struggle to help extended family adjust to new family arrangements, especially if the child is of a different race or ethnicity than the original family. Experts suggest educating these family members as much as possible before the child enters the home to alleviate undue stress.