Individuals or families who are preparing to adopt have likely read books and articles and talked to professionals about how to be successful at adoptive parenting. However, a former adopted child decided to share her perspective on what adoptive parents should know, and this brings a fresh take on the aspects of the adoption process that are not immediately considered.
The writer shares that it’s important to keep in mind that adoption is impossible without some type of loss. When a child loses his/her parents, this is traumatic, regardless of the child’s age. This will also affect the relationship that children have with their adoptive parents, so parents should be prepared to lovingly work with children who are dealing with abandonment or anger.
The author also shares that children need to be reminded that they are loved — often. This is particularly important on days when the child is being particularly difficult. Love is not a substitute for being adopted, but having the support and care of loving adoptive parents can help a child tremendously.
It is important for adoptive parents to continually reassure their children that they won’t leave or abandon them. Even if this happens on a daily basis, there is a still a small part of many adoptees that is afraid of abandonment. Parents should be understanding and sensitive to this. It’s also essential for adoptive parents to already be ready to advocate for their children when friends, family and school administrators ask potential hurtful or rude questions concerning adoption. Children who have been adopted need to know that someone will stand up for them no matter what, for as long as it takes.
For additional information on adoptive parenting and the adoption process, visit www.huffingtopost.com.